Hey Fuzzy!
So much has happened recently! I am sooooo sorry I haven't written in awhile.
Right now, school is stressing me out. I decided to be stupid and take some hard classes (in otherwords, AP European History). Also, midterm exams are only a month or so away! AHH!
Last month, I had a sweet 16 (though it wasn't really close to my birthday... kinda procrastinated). It was fun. We had a dinosaur cake, played games such as GoldRush, etc. It was a "kids" themed party, so there was a pinata, party hats, pin the tail....etc.
Recently, it's been cold. Today, for example, had a windchill of -13 degrees F. I get to have the pleasure of running in this weather everyday for track....let's just say it gets really cold. Speaking of track...this past weekend, I got to go to a 2-day track meet. I personally thought I did horribly. Luckily, though, now I know what the track is like (since I've never done indoor), so next time should be better.
This past week, however, may perhaps have been one of the worst weeks ever. It all started last monday, december 6th. While driving home after track, we came across a pretty bad car accident. Police hadn't arrived yet, so I assume I got there a couple of minutes after it happened. It turns out a drunk driver had hit the car, killing the guy in it. To think that if I had left Food Lion just a few minutes earlier.... Then, to make the week worse, I've basically been stalked by one guy, and I found out that one of my best friend's ex's (also one of my twin's ex's) likes me....how wrong is that?! Then, of course, I did terribly in the track meet. Also, this past saturday, the 11th, I found my gerbil, Skittles, dead. I miss her soooo much! I got her in 7th grade (I'm currently in 10th). I remember choosing her because she was the most energetic. Through the past few years, she has seen me struggle with depression, struggle with body image, fight trich, the few times I tried cutting, the death of my uncle, etc. It's just been terrible.
I cannot wait until christmas. It's so soon!!! Oh yea, I still haven't pulled a single hair from my scalp. However, other places haven't been so great...not terrible, but still not great....
Well it's well past my bedtime on a school night, so goodnight!
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
My hair... IT'S SO SHORT!
Hey Fuzzy!
Okay, so school started this monday... and so far I'm already stressed out! AHHH!
Anyways... So recently I went to florida & visited my aunt. I had a blast :) The gulf of mexico was so nice!
ANYWAYS.
I GOT MY HAIR CUT!
It's shoulderlength with sideswept bangs and layers.... I'll post a photo on trichworld soon.
The stylist was very nice. She didn't make me feel uncomfortable, and even incorperated my regrowth into my haircut (I had shorter layers... they blend in now).
Well, I'm tired... waking up at 5:30am sucks.
So, Goodnight!
Okay, so school started this monday... and so far I'm already stressed out! AHHH!
Anyways... So recently I went to florida & visited my aunt. I had a blast :) The gulf of mexico was so nice!
ANYWAYS.
I GOT MY HAIR CUT!
It's shoulderlength with sideswept bangs and layers.... I'll post a photo on trichworld soon.
The stylist was very nice. She didn't make me feel uncomfortable, and even incorperated my regrowth into my haircut (I had shorter layers... they blend in now).
Well, I'm tired... waking up at 5:30am sucks.
So, Goodnight!
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Hey Fuzzy!
Boy, do I have a LOT to update on! I've been gone for about 4 1/2 weeks... so I'll split this up into each week.
Week 1:
Okay, so I'm a camper at my favorite camp ever, which is in PA. The week is amazing. I do low ropes, tie dye, etc. I hiked up Peter's Mountain on a really humid day with some buddies of mine. Never hike up a steep, rocky mountain in humid, hot weather while dehydrated... you might get a headache. Also, never go on an adventure in flipflops like some of my friends did. A few of my friends and I also went to the lake in the middle of the night... it was so peaceful and relaxing, and the full moon was beautiful. I also learned a few volleyball tips (I suck at volleyball). Three of my friends (Peter, Carlos and Sharon) learned to never stargaze in the middle of an unbusy road... the guy who employes everyone working there might sneak up on you with his car. It was super fun :) To end the week was my first LaudryMat experience (at the end of the week I became volunteer staff). The staff goes each friday night. My washing machine (which I was sharing with a few other people) ended of spewing soapy water all of the floor, creating a slippy circle for us :)
Week 2:
I'm volunteering at the same camp with my sister. Both of us are in the main center, working in the kitchen. We were working with family campers. My sister was helping with the dishroom, while myself and 2 other people were working in the dining room vacumming, etc. Also during that week, I conquered my massive fear of heights for the day. One of my friends who is a Rec Director there told me how rock climbing helped him, so for the first time in a few years, I decided to do the rock wall -- the hardest one. It took me awhile, but I made it. There were so many times I just wanted to quit, but with the help of my friends, I made it, and it felt GREAT! Also, I got to learn all the inside jokes among the staff, and felt really welcomed. Towards the end of the week, my friend, Ben, my sister, another guy named Matt, and a lifegaurd, Jacob, created an airband. There were kids asking for their signatures :P That friday, we went back to the LaundryMat. Zil and my machine went crazy. It filled up with soapy water then stopped working, so we had to transfer the soaking clothing to a different laundry machine, which ended up spilling a little soapy water. :P Also that weekend was a staff event: The Amazing Race 2010. We got clues and raced (going in the speedlimits) to certain locations, etc. The people in the car I was in coulda died though. Our driver was going too fast on a counrty road at night, and didn't see a turn. I've never heard breaks scream so loud, nor have ever smelled tires burn so much. We missed the trees and woods by inches. If the driver hadn't reacted when she did, we would've rammed into the woods..... I was really shaky after that.
Week 3:
My sister and I were also volunteering this week. I was up at the other eating facility this week. I enjoyed the change -- I was working for people about my age. I got to see a friend, emily, I hadn't seen for about three years. So much has changed for both of us. This week, I got to join the airband as a backup guitarist/singer. Fun stuff :) Being in the kitchen, though, was tough. I worked all three meals, probably working about 11 hours a day. During breaks, I'd help out with Moms & Tots, which was also going on that week. I always got such an energy boost from those kids. Since it was the last week of camp, we all had an allnighter the last night. It was fun. I actually did okay at volleyball, gazed at the stars, watched some random movie I don't remember (from being so dead tired), etc. It was sooo fun. Saying goodbye sucked though :(
Week 4:
My family and I went to Bethany Beach. The weather was really nice except for thursday night, when it rained. I never knew how much more confidence I gained from being pf from my scalp starting jan. 2. My hair looked normal in the ocean -- no bald spots, no worries. I could let my hair down, rather than having to place it up a certain way. I actaully liked having my hair wet. Before the storm, the waves were perfect. They were huge, and fun. Yeah, there was a stronger current, but it wasn't too bad. Those were the best waves I've ever experienced. Friday, though, the waves were way to big and far out. The lifegaurds didn't let anyone really get into the water -- with good reason: the current was so strong, like a riptide. They were having to go out several times to bring kids in. The waves also broke early, and they weren't fun. The boardwalk was nice, though. I enjoyed getting icecream from the same shop I used to get it from when I was ittybitty. The last night we were there, last friday, we went to ocean city. We went on a few rides and saw a sandsculpture. Needless to say, the beach was fun :)
Week 5 (so far):
So far, this week I've been in D.C. My friend, my sister, myself, and my mom went to the fair near there. It was soo much fun! I got to hold a baby goat, and we saw cows, bunnies, goats, mini horses, normal horses, pigs, etc. One of my other favorite parts of the day was watching the pig races. They raced piglets, ducks, goats, rookie piglets, and potbelly pigs. It was adorable ^_^ At night, we went on a few rides. I felt very accomplished -- I went on the two tallest rides there (the really high swing one, and the one that takes you up and drops you). I'm super scared of heights, but sometimes a little peer pressure can be good! I had fun :) We also tried fried oreos, which I'm not a huge fan of... I don't like the chocolate cookie taste. To end the night, my friend, my sister and I all raced down one of the little kid slides... and I won... twice... take that twin sister! :P
Anyways, these past few weeks have been some of the best. I haven't gotten my haircut yet, but I'm hoping to this weekend. Sadly, school starts the 30th.... so soon! AHHHH!
Well, it's getting late, so goodnight and talk to you soon (hopefully!)
Boy, do I have a LOT to update on! I've been gone for about 4 1/2 weeks... so I'll split this up into each week.
Week 1:
Okay, so I'm a camper at my favorite camp ever, which is in PA. The week is amazing. I do low ropes, tie dye, etc. I hiked up Peter's Mountain on a really humid day with some buddies of mine. Never hike up a steep, rocky mountain in humid, hot weather while dehydrated... you might get a headache. Also, never go on an adventure in flipflops like some of my friends did. A few of my friends and I also went to the lake in the middle of the night... it was so peaceful and relaxing, and the full moon was beautiful. I also learned a few volleyball tips (I suck at volleyball). Three of my friends (Peter, Carlos and Sharon) learned to never stargaze in the middle of an unbusy road... the guy who employes everyone working there might sneak up on you with his car. It was super fun :) To end the week was my first LaudryMat experience (at the end of the week I became volunteer staff). The staff goes each friday night. My washing machine (which I was sharing with a few other people) ended of spewing soapy water all of the floor, creating a slippy circle for us :)
Week 2:
I'm volunteering at the same camp with my sister. Both of us are in the main center, working in the kitchen. We were working with family campers. My sister was helping with the dishroom, while myself and 2 other people were working in the dining room vacumming, etc. Also during that week, I conquered my massive fear of heights for the day. One of my friends who is a Rec Director there told me how rock climbing helped him, so for the first time in a few years, I decided to do the rock wall -- the hardest one. It took me awhile, but I made it. There were so many times I just wanted to quit, but with the help of my friends, I made it, and it felt GREAT! Also, I got to learn all the inside jokes among the staff, and felt really welcomed. Towards the end of the week, my friend, Ben, my sister, another guy named Matt, and a lifegaurd, Jacob, created an airband. There were kids asking for their signatures :P That friday, we went back to the LaundryMat. Zil and my machine went crazy. It filled up with soapy water then stopped working, so we had to transfer the soaking clothing to a different laundry machine, which ended up spilling a little soapy water. :P Also that weekend was a staff event: The Amazing Race 2010. We got clues and raced (going in the speedlimits) to certain locations, etc. The people in the car I was in coulda died though. Our driver was going too fast on a counrty road at night, and didn't see a turn. I've never heard breaks scream so loud, nor have ever smelled tires burn so much. We missed the trees and woods by inches. If the driver hadn't reacted when she did, we would've rammed into the woods..... I was really shaky after that.
Week 3:
My sister and I were also volunteering this week. I was up at the other eating facility this week. I enjoyed the change -- I was working for people about my age. I got to see a friend, emily, I hadn't seen for about three years. So much has changed for both of us. This week, I got to join the airband as a backup guitarist/singer. Fun stuff :) Being in the kitchen, though, was tough. I worked all three meals, probably working about 11 hours a day. During breaks, I'd help out with Moms & Tots, which was also going on that week. I always got such an energy boost from those kids. Since it was the last week of camp, we all had an allnighter the last night. It was fun. I actually did okay at volleyball, gazed at the stars, watched some random movie I don't remember (from being so dead tired), etc. It was sooo fun. Saying goodbye sucked though :(
Week 4:
My family and I went to Bethany Beach. The weather was really nice except for thursday night, when it rained. I never knew how much more confidence I gained from being pf from my scalp starting jan. 2. My hair looked normal in the ocean -- no bald spots, no worries. I could let my hair down, rather than having to place it up a certain way. I actaully liked having my hair wet. Before the storm, the waves were perfect. They were huge, and fun. Yeah, there was a stronger current, but it wasn't too bad. Those were the best waves I've ever experienced. Friday, though, the waves were way to big and far out. The lifegaurds didn't let anyone really get into the water -- with good reason: the current was so strong, like a riptide. They were having to go out several times to bring kids in. The waves also broke early, and they weren't fun. The boardwalk was nice, though. I enjoyed getting icecream from the same shop I used to get it from when I was ittybitty. The last night we were there, last friday, we went to ocean city. We went on a few rides and saw a sandsculpture. Needless to say, the beach was fun :)
Week 5 (so far):
So far, this week I've been in D.C. My friend, my sister, myself, and my mom went to the fair near there. It was soo much fun! I got to hold a baby goat, and we saw cows, bunnies, goats, mini horses, normal horses, pigs, etc. One of my other favorite parts of the day was watching the pig races. They raced piglets, ducks, goats, rookie piglets, and potbelly pigs. It was adorable ^_^ At night, we went on a few rides. I felt very accomplished -- I went on the two tallest rides there (the really high swing one, and the one that takes you up and drops you). I'm super scared of heights, but sometimes a little peer pressure can be good! I had fun :) We also tried fried oreos, which I'm not a huge fan of... I don't like the chocolate cookie taste. To end the night, my friend, my sister and I all raced down one of the little kid slides... and I won... twice... take that twin sister! :P
Anyways, these past few weeks have been some of the best. I haven't gotten my haircut yet, but I'm hoping to this weekend. Sadly, school starts the 30th.... so soon! AHHHH!
Well, it's getting late, so goodnight and talk to you soon (hopefully!)
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Failing's My "Norm"
Fuzz:
Sorry about not writing back the next day... I was busy.
Anyways, I wasn't pullfree on monday, tuesday or today... :(
You see, today, I had to wake up early so that I could join my friend in her cross country training program. I used to be a distance runner, and used to destroy her at it. But now, having not run over a mile in over a year, feel like a complete and total idiot. I could only run 3 miles, and was the very last of the pack. One of my friends even ran over 14 miles in about an hour and a half. The friend I used to run much better than ran at least 5... I just feel so stupid for even going... as well as sad knowing how much worse I got. Last year, 3 miles seemed like nothing...
So, yea. I'm really dissapointed in myself, and even more frustrated that I feel like I let my parents down (they paid $14 for my twin and I to run the whole summer). I feel like such a failure....
Well, I'm out for now.
Sorry about not writing back the next day... I was busy.
Anyways, I wasn't pullfree on monday, tuesday or today... :(
You see, today, I had to wake up early so that I could join my friend in her cross country training program. I used to be a distance runner, and used to destroy her at it. But now, having not run over a mile in over a year, feel like a complete and total idiot. I could only run 3 miles, and was the very last of the pack. One of my friends even ran over 14 miles in about an hour and a half. The friend I used to run much better than ran at least 5... I just feel so stupid for even going... as well as sad knowing how much worse I got. Last year, 3 miles seemed like nothing...
So, yea. I'm really dissapointed in myself, and even more frustrated that I feel like I let my parents down (they paid $14 for my twin and I to run the whole summer). I feel like such a failure....
Well, I'm out for now.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Nothin Better than Sippin a RootBeer Float on America's Birthday(:
Hey Fuzz!
So, I can't say I was pf today. You see, I have an excuse for it. Okay, so I'm an EXTREMELY light sleeper, and my parents... well, they snore.... LOUD. So I had to share a room with them, and I couldn't get to sleep. I got to sleep at 4am. Yea, I pulled a little due to the frustration of not being able to sleep.
Anyways, yesterday, riding the 4wheeler was fun (I ride them at my "grandma's farm" [really my great uncle's farm]). And the reunion today was also fun. Lots of food, Lots of joy(:
BUT that's not what I wanted to talk about....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA!!!!!!!!!!
Like the title of this entry says: "Nothin better than sippin on a rootbeer float on America's bday".
I love fireworks, which is one of the biggest reasons I LOVE the 4th of july. I absolutely love how the different colors, shapes, sparkles, etc all play out (:
I also love being able to hangout with friends on this day. Needless to say, I had a blast.
Sorry I haven't really written much. It's just that I'm being fueled on no sleep...
SO, I'll talk more about it tomorrow. Night fuzzy! :D
So, I can't say I was pf today. You see, I have an excuse for it. Okay, so I'm an EXTREMELY light sleeper, and my parents... well, they snore.... LOUD. So I had to share a room with them, and I couldn't get to sleep. I got to sleep at 4am. Yea, I pulled a little due to the frustration of not being able to sleep.
Anyways, yesterday, riding the 4wheeler was fun (I ride them at my "grandma's farm" [really my great uncle's farm]). And the reunion today was also fun. Lots of food, Lots of joy(:
BUT that's not what I wanted to talk about....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA!!!!!!!!!!
Like the title of this entry says: "Nothin better than sippin on a rootbeer float on America's bday".
I love fireworks, which is one of the biggest reasons I LOVE the 4th of july. I absolutely love how the different colors, shapes, sparkles, etc all play out (:
I also love being able to hangout with friends on this day. Needless to say, I had a blast.
Sorry I haven't really written much. It's just that I'm being fueled on no sleep...
SO, I'll talk more about it tomorrow. Night fuzzy! :D
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Just an Update(:
Hey Fuzzy!
Okay, so I'm about to leave for a family reunion (outta state) soon, so I'll make this quick.
Bad News:
Okay, so I did pull some Monday (i think it was monday...). None of my scalp hair, but I am still EXTREMELY dissapointed in myself. I kept asking myself the "what if?" questions: "what if I had gotten to bed sooner?" "what if I decided not to listen to my ipod?" "what if I hadn't given in to temptation?". That would mean that as of today, I am.... 167 days pf! (if you include today, of course).
Secondly, I decided that I will NOT be cutting my hair UNTIL a few days or so before school starts. This will allow my hair to grow a little more for my donation, as well as suprise my friends more :)
Good News:
I will be less likely to pull this weekend at my family reunion because I will constantly be around people, as well as having a blast:)
Also, I found out my final grades for the school year. This year, I have........(drumroll)...... a 4.0 gpa. So, I got A's in all my classes this freshman year in highschool(:
Well, my parent's are calling me (to leave for the reunion), so gotta go fuzz!
P.S. sorry I didn't write sooner... never did go to the library again that visit. thanks for being patient!
Okay, so I'm about to leave for a family reunion (outta state) soon, so I'll make this quick.
Bad News:
Okay, so I did pull some Monday (i think it was monday...). None of my scalp hair, but I am still EXTREMELY dissapointed in myself. I kept asking myself the "what if?" questions: "what if I had gotten to bed sooner?" "what if I decided not to listen to my ipod?" "what if I hadn't given in to temptation?". That would mean that as of today, I am.... 167 days pf! (if you include today, of course).
Secondly, I decided that I will NOT be cutting my hair UNTIL a few days or so before school starts. This will allow my hair to grow a little more for my donation, as well as suprise my friends more :)
Good News:
I will be less likely to pull this weekend at my family reunion because I will constantly be around people, as well as having a blast:)
Also, I found out my final grades for the school year. This year, I have........(drumroll)...... a 4.0 gpa. So, I got A's in all my classes this freshman year in highschool(:
Well, my parent's are calling me (to leave for the reunion), so gotta go fuzz!
P.S. sorry I didn't write sooner... never did go to the library again that visit. thanks for being patient!
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Water & Me Are Gettin Along Again :)
Hey Fuzz!
Sorry, I haven't written in so long!
Unfortunately, I can't really calculate my days pf at the moment. I accidentally left my calander at home (I'm visiting my friends and family right now).
I am writing to you guys from a nice, small library today (and probably for the rest of the week, if I come). This is because there is no internet connection at my grandparents' house.
Anyways, so far, summer's been a blast! On wednesday, I hungout with a friend of mine who I haven't seen in THREE YEARS! I had fun. We went to the pool, and then I spent the night over at her place.
Yesterday, I was lucky to spend time with my best friend (since 1st grade... I'm going into 10th). We went to a waterpark, and had a blast! I took photos, of course :) Anyways, I'll be sure to put some of those pictures up on my trichworld page. After spending 5 hours going down slides, taking pictures, and drifting around the lazy river, we went to stop by at a nice pasta (fast food) place called Noodles & Co. I got spaghetti (YUM) >:)
I have found that I am MUCH more confident when going to the pool and to waterparks (and in the water) since I've been pullfree. I don't have to worry about people seeing bald spots, or judging me for them. It's not so stressful anymore. I don't have to mess with my hair all the time. I can finally enjoy the experience. I'm more willing to say "Yes, I'd LOVE to go to the pool" instead of having to say ".. I don't like the pool.....". It's great :)
I have found that being busy has helped me TREMENDOUSLY with my pulling. I haven't pulled since my last entry :) Also, I find that when I say I WILL be pullfree for the day, and write it, that I usually strive more to reach that goal.
Anyways........ It's summer, which means....
ITS ABOUT TIME TO GET MY HAIR CUT :D :D :D
Since I haven't pulled ANY scalp or eyebrow hair starting Jan. 2, I'm treating myself to a cut. I hope to get layered, shoulderlength hair with sideswept bangs. I still haven't set a date yet though, haha. I'm going to donate my hair to Locks of Love. I CAN'T WAIT! Last time I got my hair cut at a salon was in 5th grade, I believe. Oh, the anxiety and anticipation :)
Well, the library closes in about 30 minutes, and the wi-fi ends in 15, so I'll talk to you later!
Sorry, I haven't written in so long!
Unfortunately, I can't really calculate my days pf at the moment. I accidentally left my calander at home (I'm visiting my friends and family right now).
I am writing to you guys from a nice, small library today (and probably for the rest of the week, if I come). This is because there is no internet connection at my grandparents' house.
Anyways, so far, summer's been a blast! On wednesday, I hungout with a friend of mine who I haven't seen in THREE YEARS! I had fun. We went to the pool, and then I spent the night over at her place.
Yesterday, I was lucky to spend time with my best friend (since 1st grade... I'm going into 10th). We went to a waterpark, and had a blast! I took photos, of course :) Anyways, I'll be sure to put some of those pictures up on my trichworld page. After spending 5 hours going down slides, taking pictures, and drifting around the lazy river, we went to stop by at a nice pasta (fast food) place called Noodles & Co. I got spaghetti (YUM) >:)
I have found that I am MUCH more confident when going to the pool and to waterparks (and in the water) since I've been pullfree. I don't have to worry about people seeing bald spots, or judging me for them. It's not so stressful anymore. I don't have to mess with my hair all the time. I can finally enjoy the experience. I'm more willing to say "Yes, I'd LOVE to go to the pool" instead of having to say ".. I don't like the pool.....". It's great :)
I have found that being busy has helped me TREMENDOUSLY with my pulling. I haven't pulled since my last entry :) Also, I find that when I say I WILL be pullfree for the day, and write it, that I usually strive more to reach that goal.
Anyways........ It's summer, which means....
ITS ABOUT TIME TO GET MY HAIR CUT :D :D :D
Since I haven't pulled ANY scalp or eyebrow hair starting Jan. 2, I'm treating myself to a cut. I hope to get layered, shoulderlength hair with sideswept bangs. I still haven't set a date yet though, haha. I'm going to donate my hair to Locks of Love. I CAN'T WAIT! Last time I got my hair cut at a salon was in 5th grade, I believe. Oh, the anxiety and anticipation :)
Well, the library closes in about 30 minutes, and the wi-fi ends in 15, so I'll talk to you later!
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Oh, I was a FREAK!
sorry fuz!
I didn't write the next day, or the day after, and I'm sorry for that. I'm writing now, though :)
So I went to my friend's graduation party on sunday, and it was a blast! The food was amazing, and the time was awesome. (Oh yea, in case you didn't know, I'm a freshman.. my sis and I were the only freshmen there ^_^) Anyways, we all made a human pyramid, took tons of pictures, set off some small fireworks, watched southpark (:D), ate a ton of delicious food, etc. The one thing I will probably remember most (besides one completely awful unphotogenic picture), will be when we all tossed some people into the air. We used sheets and a tarp. I was one of the people thrown into the air. Even though heights freak me out, I am SO GLAD I DID IT. Who knew peer pressure could be a good thing? In 50 years, I'm gonna remember it :)
My sunburn is healing up, and no longer hurts (yay!). It's about time, haha.
Today, will hopefully be my 152 day pullfree. These small slipups are so reoccurring! I hate it! I need to do better at controlling it. Until I pull a hair from my scalp, however (my main site), I will not restart completely.
Just now, however, has been pretty emotional. I looked back at some old photos. I was so pretty before January of 5th grade (when my trich started). I was so photogenic, had amazing hair, etc. After January, though, the hair went first. It started looking sloppy, unkept, etc. Eventually I had little "bangs" going on. Next were the eyebrows.. they looked terrible! It looked like someone had taken a light brown thin-tip sharpie and did a freaky arch eyebrow. Then went my lashes. I had huge chunks missing. And in 6th grade, I didn't wear eyeliner.... In other words, I looked like a freak. It was awful. I'd like to thank those friends who stuck with me through this horrible period of my life.
That's all I feel like bringing up today. Maybe one day I'll post a picture of this period of time.
Byeee!
I didn't write the next day, or the day after, and I'm sorry for that. I'm writing now, though :)
So I went to my friend's graduation party on sunday, and it was a blast! The food was amazing, and the time was awesome. (Oh yea, in case you didn't know, I'm a freshman.. my sis and I were the only freshmen there ^_^) Anyways, we all made a human pyramid, took tons of pictures, set off some small fireworks, watched southpark (:D), ate a ton of delicious food, etc. The one thing I will probably remember most (besides one completely awful unphotogenic picture), will be when we all tossed some people into the air. We used sheets and a tarp. I was one of the people thrown into the air. Even though heights freak me out, I am SO GLAD I DID IT. Who knew peer pressure could be a good thing? In 50 years, I'm gonna remember it :)
My sunburn is healing up, and no longer hurts (yay!). It's about time, haha.
Today, will hopefully be my 152 day pullfree. These small slipups are so reoccurring! I hate it! I need to do better at controlling it. Until I pull a hair from my scalp, however (my main site), I will not restart completely.
Just now, however, has been pretty emotional. I looked back at some old photos. I was so pretty before January of 5th grade (when my trich started). I was so photogenic, had amazing hair, etc. After January, though, the hair went first. It started looking sloppy, unkept, etc. Eventually I had little "bangs" going on. Next were the eyebrows.. they looked terrible! It looked like someone had taken a light brown thin-tip sharpie and did a freaky arch eyebrow. Then went my lashes. I had huge chunks missing. And in 6th grade, I didn't wear eyeliner.... In other words, I looked like a freak. It was awful. I'd like to thank those friends who stuck with me through this horrible period of my life.
That's all I feel like bringing up today. Maybe one day I'll post a picture of this period of time.
Byeee!
Saturday, June 12, 2010
OwW! Sunburn!
Fuzzy.
Sorry I haven't written in so long! I have a TON to update on.
Last week (litterally, last saturday), I volunteered to help out at some little league end-of-season party. I got to work the cotton candy machine. Yea, I'm never eating cotton candy AGAIN. Too much cotton candy for a lifetime, haha.
On sunday, I got to go to an end-of-year picnic. The weather was cooler than normal, which was fine by me. It was fun. Lots of food. :)
For the past few days, my brother's friends and my sister's friends have been coming over. We've been playing Call Of Duty (COD), multiple video games, etc.
Yesterday, I went to the pool with my sister's friends. BAD IDEA. My hair stayed in place, and was not a problem. I shouldn't have gone... I didn't want to... but I did... and now I have the worst sunburn of my life. It still stings. It's not even EVEN. it's all splotchy, etc. ugh, I hate my life. My friends had told me I wasn't burning. I'm pretty pissed off at how burned I got. :(
I've been mostly pullfree, but I haven't calculated the days yet, so I'll try to keep you updated either tomorrow or the day after.
Bye!
Sorry I haven't written in so long! I have a TON to update on.
Last week (litterally, last saturday), I volunteered to help out at some little league end-of-season party. I got to work the cotton candy machine. Yea, I'm never eating cotton candy AGAIN. Too much cotton candy for a lifetime, haha.
On sunday, I got to go to an end-of-year picnic. The weather was cooler than normal, which was fine by me. It was fun. Lots of food. :)
For the past few days, my brother's friends and my sister's friends have been coming over. We've been playing Call Of Duty (COD), multiple video games, etc.
Yesterday, I went to the pool with my sister's friends. BAD IDEA. My hair stayed in place, and was not a problem. I shouldn't have gone... I didn't want to... but I did... and now I have the worst sunburn of my life. It still stings. It's not even EVEN. it's all splotchy, etc. ugh, I hate my life. My friends had told me I wasn't burning. I'm pretty pissed off at how burned I got. :(
I've been mostly pullfree, but I haven't calculated the days yet, so I'll try to keep you updated either tomorrow or the day after.
Bye!
Saturday, June 5, 2010
School's OUT!
Fuzzy!
School's out for the summer!!! :D Our last official day was June 4th. Hopefully I won't have to go back this upcoming week for finals (only one class that I might have to). Anyways, this is what I'm PLANNING to do this summer:
1. Volunteer at VBS (also today I'm volunteering at another church thing)
2. Complete the bucketlist my best friend, my sister, and I created (it's awesome)
3. Go to a camp I've been going to since forever (BEST.CAMP.EVER)
4. Watch fireworks :)
5. Go to 2 family reunions
6. Take a TON of pictures
7. Write my friends in another camp all summer
8. Go to the beach (in Delaware... I hate BP right now for the oil situation!)
9. Maybe have a sweet 16 birthday party (my sis' & my b-day is in early oct.)
10. GET A HAIRCUT :D :D :D I think I've earned it :)
Well, I gotta go eat, but I'll be sure to write either tonight or tomorrow :)
School's out for the summer!!! :D Our last official day was June 4th. Hopefully I won't have to go back this upcoming week for finals (only one class that I might have to). Anyways, this is what I'm PLANNING to do this summer:
1. Volunteer at VBS (also today I'm volunteering at another church thing)
2. Complete the bucketlist my best friend, my sister, and I created (it's awesome)
3. Go to a camp I've been going to since forever (BEST.CAMP.EVER)
4. Watch fireworks :)
5. Go to 2 family reunions
6. Take a TON of pictures
7. Write my friends in another camp all summer
8. Go to the beach (in Delaware... I hate BP right now for the oil situation!)
9. Maybe have a sweet 16 birthday party (my sis' & my b-day is in early oct.)
10. GET A HAIRCUT :D :D :D I think I've earned it :)
Well, I gotta go eat, but I'll be sure to write either tonight or tomorrow :)
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
God Bless Our School & Its Kids...
Dear Fuzzy.
I was debating on writing today, as I've been dumped with mounds of homework (which is why I'm super stressed.). Today will be my 134th day if I make it pf. Anyways, not the point.
I'm going to tell you what happened today. Today, we got school off. As you may know, we're at the middleschool now. Anyways, I get to school, stressed (been doing homework non-stop today). I relax a bit, since I couldn't do anything at school (computer stuff). Anyways, I notice that the bell doesn't ring. My friends and I are confused. We hear word that "Schools Closed" (everyone shouts). We go outside, confused. Rumors speculate. Is it senior prank? What's going on? I play frisbee with my friends outside. We get word: a middleschooler had brought handguns and ammo. That's right, a middleschooler. Guns. Ammo. Inside. School. We go home.
These questions immediately ran through my mind: Why does a middleschooler have guns? Why is this happening HERE (there's like no gangs/crime here). What was he (or she) planning to do? Thank God no one was hurt! What would've happened if we didn't know, and went through school as always?
I feel the worst for those who's family members died in the Tech tragedy. This must serve as an awful & painful reminderof 4/16.
Well, Over & Out for now.
I was debating on writing today, as I've been dumped with mounds of homework (which is why I'm super stressed.). Today will be my 134th day if I make it pf. Anyways, not the point.
I'm going to tell you what happened today. Today, we got school off. As you may know, we're at the middleschool now. Anyways, I get to school, stressed (been doing homework non-stop today). I relax a bit, since I couldn't do anything at school (computer stuff). Anyways, I notice that the bell doesn't ring. My friends and I are confused. We hear word that "Schools Closed" (everyone shouts). We go outside, confused. Rumors speculate. Is it senior prank? What's going on? I play frisbee with my friends outside. We get word: a middleschooler had brought handguns and ammo. That's right, a middleschooler. Guns. Ammo. Inside. School. We go home.
These questions immediately ran through my mind: Why does a middleschooler have guns? Why is this happening HERE (there's like no gangs/crime here). What was he (or she) planning to do? Thank God no one was hurt! What would've happened if we didn't know, and went through school as always?
I feel the worst for those who's family members died in the Tech tragedy. This must serve as an awful & painful reminderof 4/16.
Well, Over & Out for now.
Friday, May 14, 2010
The One Time I DONT Like Thunder...
Hi Fuzzy!
Okay, so today's been a pretty good day :) I don't know why it has, it just has.
Unfortunately, though, today's track meet was canceled. This was going to be my last meet of the season :( I was extremely pumped up and excited for this meet too! Stupid weather (thunder, lightning). I had just finished warming up, and was getting my runthroughs for longjump when it began thundering. O well.
Anyways, I have my times in from last wednesday's meet:
Long Jump: 11 feet 10 inches
200m Dash: 31.83 seconds
400m Dash: 1:13.31
These scores are my PR in these events :)
I was planning on getting a 1:12 this meet for the 400, and another 31 on the 200, but of course that didn't happen (thanks weather) (-.-)
O well. There's always next year.
Anyways, this will be my 126th day pf :)
Well, have to go!!
Okay, so today's been a pretty good day :) I don't know why it has, it just has.
Unfortunately, though, today's track meet was canceled. This was going to be my last meet of the season :( I was extremely pumped up and excited for this meet too! Stupid weather (thunder, lightning). I had just finished warming up, and was getting my runthroughs for longjump when it began thundering. O well.
Anyways, I have my times in from last wednesday's meet:
Long Jump: 11 feet 10 inches
200m Dash: 31.83 seconds
400m Dash: 1:13.31
These scores are my PR in these events :)
I was planning on getting a 1:12 this meet for the 400, and another 31 on the 200, but of course that didn't happen (thanks weather) (-.-)
O well. There's always next year.
Anyways, this will be my 126th day pf :)
Well, have to go!!
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Feeling Good :D
Hey Fuzzy.
So tomorrow I have a track meet (last one for me of the season) :). I'm the only sprinter girl going (cause the others either can't make it or are going to one today instead). Today in practice, I beat a guy in one of our sprints (though he won't admit it), which NEVER HAPPENS. Also, one of the guys decided to do the sprints slower, which he's done a few times when racing girls (I'm guessing to make us feel better :) ). Anyways, so today was fun (track) :).
Yesterday, I had to miss track because I had to do something for an event my mom was running. I had to "model" two outfits. I'm a tomboy, so you can just imagine how excited I was to be forced to do this. Anyways, when getting my makeup done, the makeup artist made a comment that really shocked me:
"You have some really beautiful and thick eyelashes."
(I don't remember the exact quote, but this is basically it)
Being someone with trich, this meant a TON to me. I don't remember the last time ANYONE's ever commented on my eyelashes being thick. She also went on about how my eyes were some of the prettiest eye's she's ever seen. She also commented on people would pay for lips like mine. Can I say MAJOR self-esteem boost? I felt beautiful for the rest of the day. If only she knew how much her comments meant to me. :)
Anyways, this will be my 124th day pf. :P
So tomorrow I have a track meet (last one for me of the season) :). I'm the only sprinter girl going (cause the others either can't make it or are going to one today instead). Today in practice, I beat a guy in one of our sprints (though he won't admit it), which NEVER HAPPENS. Also, one of the guys decided to do the sprints slower, which he's done a few times when racing girls (I'm guessing to make us feel better :) ). Anyways, so today was fun (track) :).
Yesterday, I had to miss track because I had to do something for an event my mom was running. I had to "model" two outfits. I'm a tomboy, so you can just imagine how excited I was to be forced to do this. Anyways, when getting my makeup done, the makeup artist made a comment that really shocked me:
"You have some really beautiful and thick eyelashes."
(I don't remember the exact quote, but this is basically it)
Being someone with trich, this meant a TON to me. I don't remember the last time ANYONE's ever commented on my eyelashes being thick. She also went on about how my eyes were some of the prettiest eye's she's ever seen. She also commented on people would pay for lips like mine. Can I say MAJOR self-esteem boost? I felt beautiful for the rest of the day. If only she knew how much her comments meant to me. :)
Anyways, this will be my 124th day pf. :P
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
These Photos Are Basically Shots I took of my eyelashes. I'm wearing an extremely small bit of eyeliner (none of my friends noticed I was wearing any)
Saturday, May 8, 2010
11:11
Hey Fuzz
So I'd like to tell you what I've been up to recently.
Yesterday, I was at a track meet (cosmos). It's an "invitational" meet. Anyways, my placings weren't that great, and I didn't make it into finals. However, I'm pretty sure I set PR's in all my events (PR = personal record) :) I'll let you know what I got for my events, IF I ever find out.
Today, I went to one of my friends Sweet 16's. We went bowling (which was a blast) and then went to a Japanese restaurant. I loved how they cooked the food in front of us, entertaining us with a show :) I got the steak terryaki (I know I totally butchered that word). Anyways, the food was amazing! O got my friend $20: ten dollars in quaters, and a ten dollar bill because I ran out of quarters :P He liked the present a lot :P Anyways, I had a major blast! I don't remember the last time I've had that much fun :)
I think I'm around 121 days pf. I think things will get easier when school lets out. Right now, I'm trying to pull an A in math and biology. I'm also trying to keep my A's in everthing else. However the math and science grades are extremely borderline, and if I mess up even the SLIGHTEST thing, I won't get an A. YIKES!!!
Well, I'm tired, so ttyl!
So I'd like to tell you what I've been up to recently.
Yesterday, I was at a track meet (cosmos). It's an "invitational" meet. Anyways, my placings weren't that great, and I didn't make it into finals. However, I'm pretty sure I set PR's in all my events (PR = personal record) :) I'll let you know what I got for my events, IF I ever find out.
Today, I went to one of my friends Sweet 16's. We went bowling (which was a blast) and then went to a Japanese restaurant. I loved how they cooked the food in front of us, entertaining us with a show :) I got the steak terryaki (I know I totally butchered that word). Anyways, the food was amazing! O got my friend $20: ten dollars in quaters, and a ten dollar bill because I ran out of quarters :P He liked the present a lot :P Anyways, I had a major blast! I don't remember the last time I've had that much fun :)
I think I'm around 121 days pf. I think things will get easier when school lets out. Right now, I'm trying to pull an A in math and biology. I'm also trying to keep my A's in everthing else. However the math and science grades are extremely borderline, and if I mess up even the SLIGHTEST thing, I won't get an A. YIKES!!!
Well, I'm tired, so ttyl!
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Epic Fail
Hey Fuzzy!
Sorry! I've been flooded with homework :( O well. I did pull a few hairs yesterday when reading (stupid english)! I've been doing so much better though :)
Today track was epic. There's this steep hill you have to go down to get on to the track. Well, when walking down, I slipped. So I ended up running. Guess who tripped in a divet on the bottom of the hill, front flipping onto her back, thus scraping her shoulder, part of her forearm, hip, and knee? That's right, me :P In the process, I broke the lid of my water bottle, which led to the water falling out, basically destroying my phone... Then we had a hard day.. O well :P
Anyways, these past few days I've been a little depressed. I don't know why. I feel like no one where I live even likes me. I'm a misfit. It sucks. I just wish I were included, and felt loved. O well..
Well, I have a ton of homework, so goodbye for now.
Sorry! I've been flooded with homework :( O well. I did pull a few hairs yesterday when reading (stupid english)! I've been doing so much better though :)
Today track was epic. There's this steep hill you have to go down to get on to the track. Well, when walking down, I slipped. So I ended up running. Guess who tripped in a divet on the bottom of the hill, front flipping onto her back, thus scraping her shoulder, part of her forearm, hip, and knee? That's right, me :P In the process, I broke the lid of my water bottle, which led to the water falling out, basically destroying my phone... Then we had a hard day.. O well :P
Anyways, these past few days I've been a little depressed. I don't know why. I feel like no one where I live even likes me. I'm a misfit. It sucks. I just wish I were included, and felt loved. O well..
Well, I have a ton of homework, so goodbye for now.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Ahh Simplicity
Hey Fuzz.
I just wanted to let you know how I'm actually going to count pf days. I won't count the days I pulled. For example, I pulled monday (let's say that was going to be day 3 for example), so I wont count it. But since I was pf on tuesday, I'd count it as day 3. So today would then be my 116th day pf (OUCH!)
Well write back later!
I just wanted to let you know how I'm actually going to count pf days. I won't count the days I pulled. For example, I pulled monday (let's say that was going to be day 3 for example), so I wont count it. But since I was pf on tuesday, I'd count it as day 3. So today would then be my 116th day pf (OUCH!)
Well write back later!
Thursday, April 29, 2010
The Day After.
Hey Fuzz.
I'm feeling MUCH better today. Haven't pulled yet. I've made it harder to gain access to pulling. I've also moved my playdoh back up near my bed. I hope this things will help. I'm still not going to "start over" (still saying that this will be my 118th day pf), mainly because I don't think I could handle such a defeat. Sorry, but this entry will be much like a random rant-like thing.
Why I Hate Trich:
1. It makes me feel like a freak
2. It doesn't let me be normal
3. I want beautiful hair, but am unable to have it
4. I hate feeling hopeless
5. I hate dissapointing my friends and family
6. I hate dissapointing myself
7. It makes me feel ugly
8. It's made my relationships with others suffer
9. It's made me self concious
10. I can't let my hair down in the wind
11. The wind is my enemy
12. It consumes my time, thoughts, and energy
13. It makes me feel like a freak
14. I'm tired of keeping secrets
15. I hate hurting myself as a result
16. I can't do everything
17. I'm probably more likely to get arthritis in my hands and fingers now
18. I can't play with my hair
19. It makes me feel ashamed and embarassed
20. I've been taunted before because of it
21. I'm sick of the questions
22. I'm tired of feeling alone
23. What's normal for most, is a struggle for me
24. It's kept me up
25. I can't help it
26. It makes me depressed
ETC
I'd write more, but it's late, and I can't afford to pull again. So, goodnight. Talk to you tomorrow.
I'm feeling MUCH better today. Haven't pulled yet. I've made it harder to gain access to pulling. I've also moved my playdoh back up near my bed. I hope this things will help. I'm still not going to "start over" (still saying that this will be my 118th day pf), mainly because I don't think I could handle such a defeat. Sorry, but this entry will be much like a random rant-like thing.
Why I Hate Trich:
1. It makes me feel like a freak
2. It doesn't let me be normal
3. I want beautiful hair, but am unable to have it
4. I hate feeling hopeless
5. I hate dissapointing my friends and family
6. I hate dissapointing myself
7. It makes me feel ugly
8. It's made my relationships with others suffer
9. It's made me self concious
10. I can't let my hair down in the wind
11. The wind is my enemy
12. It consumes my time, thoughts, and energy
13. It makes me feel like a freak
14. I'm tired of keeping secrets
15. I hate hurting myself as a result
16. I can't do everything
17. I'm probably more likely to get arthritis in my hands and fingers now
18. I can't play with my hair
19. It makes me feel ashamed and embarassed
20. I've been taunted before because of it
21. I'm sick of the questions
22. I'm tired of feeling alone
23. What's normal for most, is a struggle for me
24. It's kept me up
25. I can't help it
26. It makes me depressed
ETC
I'd write more, but it's late, and I can't afford to pull again. So, goodnight. Talk to you tomorrow.
Messed Up
Fuzz:
I'm ashamed and crying as I write this. I've pulled again. Same spot as monday. Maybe 50 hairs this time. Why is this happening to me?
Dear Trich:
I HATE YOU! GO AWAY! I WANT TO BE NORMAL! I'm tired of being a freak! I'm tired of being made fun of! LEAVE ME ALONE! YOUR A JERK! You are NOT my friend! I'm SOOOO much better off without you! You make me feel like CRAP! I'M SICK AND TIRED OF YOU CONTROLLING ME! I WANT TO BE LIKE THE OTHER GIRLS! I just want to be normal.....
Dear God:
Why am I like this? I know this isn't how you want me to live... Why can't I fight this? God, please help me...
Sorry fuzz, but I feel awful. I will reflect more tomorrow
I'm ashamed and crying as I write this. I've pulled again. Same spot as monday. Maybe 50 hairs this time. Why is this happening to me?
Dear Trich:
I HATE YOU! GO AWAY! I WANT TO BE NORMAL! I'm tired of being a freak! I'm tired of being made fun of! LEAVE ME ALONE! YOUR A JERK! You are NOT my friend! I'm SOOOO much better off without you! You make me feel like CRAP! I'M SICK AND TIRED OF YOU CONTROLLING ME! I WANT TO BE LIKE THE OTHER GIRLS! I just want to be normal.....
Dear God:
Why am I like this? I know this isn't how you want me to live... Why can't I fight this? God, please help me...
Sorry fuzz, but I feel awful. I will reflect more tomorrow
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
I'm Not Proud, Take 2
Hello Fuzz.
I'm really really REALLY annoyed. You see, I JUST wrote "I'm Not Proud", and accidentally clicked the wrong button, thus deleting my 20 minutes worth of writing. -.-
Anyways, let me try again. I'm going to write about the past several days (sorry for being MIA).
First, on april 21, I ran in another track meet. Long jump was er long jump (still terrible at it). I ran the 4x100m relay, the 400m dash, and the 200m dash. My team didn't do so great in the 4x100m relay. O well. In the 200m dash, I got 1st in my heat, with a time of 1:13.42, winning by .02 seconds. I'm proud mainly because 4 days prior to this meet, I ran a pathetic 1:18-something. Which is REALLY bad. In my 200m dash, I apparently (as Ross and Kyle said) "destroyed my heat". In other words, I got first... By a LOT. :) Unfortunately, the track was asphalt, which is really hard on the shins, joints, etc. Also, I already had shin splints, which if you've ever had them, you feel my pain. The meet went well though :)
This past weekend, I went to D-Now, which is a church retreat held and hosted by my church. My sister, 2 of my friends, and I were, though we're highschoolers, put in the middlschool girls group. This is because a) there weren't many middleschool girls b) my youth leader thought we were "good role models" c) knew that we wouldn't complain (no matter how immature/annoying some middeschoolers are). I'm actually somewhat glad I was put with them. You see, I don't like a lot of kids in my grade either, and since they were all super popular (the other girls in the group I should have been in), I would have been misreable. Anyways, D-Now is an amazing experience, and is an amazing time to connect with God. We always have a speaker, usually Ron (I'll tell you about him later), and a band (performed by college students this year). It's just, well, amazing. It's hard to describe. You can just feel God's presence there, ya know? Anyways, the video scavenger hunt (we do a scavenger hunt [which we record] all around town) was fun. The only problem I had with it was that my group scripted the whole thing (which makes it look like a terrible attempt at being funny), as well as we didn't complete it with complete strangers (which is the best part :P) It was still fun. Also, 80's "prom" was amazing. Almost everyone dressed up this year. I wore my mom's old dress (from the 80s). Anyways, in conclusion, it was AWESOME (even though I was sick the whole time without any decongestant).
On monday, however, I wasn't proud. AT ALL. I pulled. I admit defeat. I'm ashamed, embarassed, etc. It wasn't any hair from the head, nor did I pull much (maybe 10 or so hairs). But still. I've decided that I'm NOT going to start over though. I'm going to say that I'm still currently 117 days pf. Why? a) I was hopped up on nyquil for the first time EVER (let's just say you "get out of it" It makes you loopy). b) it was late and I was sick and tired. I know these are pathetic excuses, but o well. I should've had a hat on. I should've printed out my tips list. I shouldn't have stayed up so late. I should've tried harder. I am forgiving myself though, and this CANNOT happen again.
Well, I've got to get started on homework (I'm loaded with it), so goodnight! I'll try to be more consistant with my journaling/blogging.
God Bless!
I'm really really REALLY annoyed. You see, I JUST wrote "I'm Not Proud", and accidentally clicked the wrong button, thus deleting my 20 minutes worth of writing. -.-
Anyways, let me try again. I'm going to write about the past several days (sorry for being MIA).
First, on april 21, I ran in another track meet. Long jump was er long jump (still terrible at it). I ran the 4x100m relay, the 400m dash, and the 200m dash. My team didn't do so great in the 4x100m relay. O well. In the 200m dash, I got 1st in my heat, with a time of 1:13.42, winning by .02 seconds. I'm proud mainly because 4 days prior to this meet, I ran a pathetic 1:18-something. Which is REALLY bad. In my 200m dash, I apparently (as Ross and Kyle said) "destroyed my heat". In other words, I got first... By a LOT. :) Unfortunately, the track was asphalt, which is really hard on the shins, joints, etc. Also, I already had shin splints, which if you've ever had them, you feel my pain. The meet went well though :)
This past weekend, I went to D-Now, which is a church retreat held and hosted by my church. My sister, 2 of my friends, and I were, though we're highschoolers, put in the middlschool girls group. This is because a) there weren't many middleschool girls b) my youth leader thought we were "good role models" c) knew that we wouldn't complain (no matter how immature/annoying some middeschoolers are). I'm actually somewhat glad I was put with them. You see, I don't like a lot of kids in my grade either, and since they were all super popular (the other girls in the group I should have been in), I would have been misreable. Anyways, D-Now is an amazing experience, and is an amazing time to connect with God. We always have a speaker, usually Ron (I'll tell you about him later), and a band (performed by college students this year). It's just, well, amazing. It's hard to describe. You can just feel God's presence there, ya know? Anyways, the video scavenger hunt (we do a scavenger hunt [which we record] all around town) was fun. The only problem I had with it was that my group scripted the whole thing (which makes it look like a terrible attempt at being funny), as well as we didn't complete it with complete strangers (which is the best part :P) It was still fun. Also, 80's "prom" was amazing. Almost everyone dressed up this year. I wore my mom's old dress (from the 80s). Anyways, in conclusion, it was AWESOME (even though I was sick the whole time without any decongestant).
On monday, however, I wasn't proud. AT ALL. I pulled. I admit defeat. I'm ashamed, embarassed, etc. It wasn't any hair from the head, nor did I pull much (maybe 10 or so hairs). But still. I've decided that I'm NOT going to start over though. I'm going to say that I'm still currently 117 days pf. Why? a) I was hopped up on nyquil for the first time EVER (let's just say you "get out of it" It makes you loopy). b) it was late and I was sick and tired. I know these are pathetic excuses, but o well. I should've had a hat on. I should've printed out my tips list. I shouldn't have stayed up so late. I should've tried harder. I am forgiving myself though, and this CANNOT happen again.
Well, I've got to get started on homework (I'm loaded with it), so goodnight! I'll try to be more consistant with my journaling/blogging.
God Bless!
Sunday, April 18, 2010
So Tired, So Stressed
Hey Fuzz.
So today, was, er, interesting.
Firstly, I'd like to talk about yesterday. So yesterday I was in a track meet. I did bad at long jump (as usual), and I was in the 4x100m relay, which my team got 3rd (out of 4, o well). Then I ran the 400m (I HATE 400s)... AND GOT 2nd IN MY HEAT!!! :D :D :D On wednesday, I got last in my heat. Yesterday, 2nd~ :D then I cooled down.... and found out I had to run a 200m (and I thought I was DONE). And in that event... 2nd AGAIN!! :D I never ever do that well in track. E.V.E.R. So I bought the T-Shirt for the meet :)
Today, however, is a different story. I was/am dead tired, and today I couldn't concentrate AT ALL. I tried to concentrate on a paper for 6 hours and got NOWHERE. Literally, the only thing I got done was my thesis. So tomorrow I'm missing track to do homework.
Today is also the 1-month anniversary of my great-uncle's death :( It's gotten easier, but still... never gonna be over it (I was supposed to see him over spring break [right before easter] but he passed before that, so I never got to say goodbye... then his funeral was in florida the next day and I couldn't even get there in time...). But yea.
Today is also my 107th day pf. I've recently had a lot of urges (YIKES), but luckily I keep my hats on and I'm fine (honestly, if I didn't wear hats, I'd be pulling... a LOT).
And well, I'd write more, but I'm gonna fall asleep in like 20 seconds, so goodnight~
So today, was, er, interesting.
Firstly, I'd like to talk about yesterday. So yesterday I was in a track meet. I did bad at long jump (as usual), and I was in the 4x100m relay, which my team got 3rd (out of 4, o well). Then I ran the 400m (I HATE 400s)... AND GOT 2nd IN MY HEAT!!! :D :D :D On wednesday, I got last in my heat. Yesterday, 2nd~ :D then I cooled down.... and found out I had to run a 200m (and I thought I was DONE). And in that event... 2nd AGAIN!! :D I never ever do that well in track. E.V.E.R. So I bought the T-Shirt for the meet :)
Today, however, is a different story. I was/am dead tired, and today I couldn't concentrate AT ALL. I tried to concentrate on a paper for 6 hours and got NOWHERE. Literally, the only thing I got done was my thesis. So tomorrow I'm missing track to do homework.
Today is also the 1-month anniversary of my great-uncle's death :( It's gotten easier, but still... never gonna be over it (I was supposed to see him over spring break [right before easter] but he passed before that, so I never got to say goodbye... then his funeral was in florida the next day and I couldn't even get there in time...). But yea.
Today is also my 107th day pf. I've recently had a lot of urges (YIKES), but luckily I keep my hats on and I'm fine (honestly, if I didn't wear hats, I'd be pulling... a LOT).
And well, I'd write more, but I'm gonna fall asleep in like 20 seconds, so goodnight~
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Wow.... Sorry!
Hey Fuzz.
I'm really sorry I haven't written in so long. From the last post, you should be able to tell that I can go crazy under stress. Anyways, today I had a ton of homework, yesterday I had track meet... Yeah, I'm about to passout from exhaustion. Oh yea, the day did get worse, in case you were wondering. I stepped in dog pee, and had to pack up. Luckily, we decided to stay :) Anyways, not too much to say. Oh yea, April 11th was my 100th day pf! I'm finding this month to be extremely hard to be pf. I don't know why... No motivation? Anyways, I'm going to write again tomorrow, as I'm about to sleep on this keyboard in 5 seconds...
Talk to you tomorrow!
P.S. I found out that the "cavity" I was thought to have wasn't a cavity at all :P
I'm really sorry I haven't written in so long. From the last post, you should be able to tell that I can go crazy under stress. Anyways, today I had a ton of homework, yesterday I had track meet... Yeah, I'm about to passout from exhaustion. Oh yea, the day did get worse, in case you were wondering. I stepped in dog pee, and had to pack up. Luckily, we decided to stay :) Anyways, not too much to say. Oh yea, April 11th was my 100th day pf! I'm finding this month to be extremely hard to be pf. I don't know why... No motivation? Anyways, I'm going to write again tomorrow, as I'm about to sleep on this keyboard in 5 seconds...
Talk to you tomorrow!
P.S. I found out that the "cavity" I was thought to have wasn't a cavity at all :P
Friday, April 2, 2010
Walls Crumble Down
Hey Fuzzy.
These past few days have sucked.
These past few days have sucked.
My mom is fighting everyone (on the topic of sugar). Let me explain. So I was at my grandmas house, getting bread, when I spotted one of my favorite cookes: Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies. I asked her if I could perhaps have one later. Well she said 'no' and my grandma told her that since I never come over that she should let me just have it. My mom exploded. Lets just say that she said some pretty nasty things, and now she's saying how I'm never going over there again. Also as a result, she's threatening that we're going back home. Another thing: I've been wanting to go to the zoo for over a year, and I was going to today. Guess who went without me? Yea, my mom. She won't stop fighting everyone and is splitting this family apart.
As a result, everyone in my family is in a pissy mood. My other grandparents are being snappy and mean. And no one understands how emotionally damaging this is for me. Its almost like they don't care if it makes me depressed, nor do they care that it makes me want to harm myself. Also, they know that stress leads to premature death, stroke, and heart attack. No, they don't care.
To top things off, while unplugging my brothers laptop (my battery was dying), my fingers wrapped around the metal prongs. Guess who got electrical shock? I did. Ugh. Can this day honestly get any worse?
I feel like I'm in a freefall, with no control, my metaphorical walls crumbling. I feel as though the only thing I can control is my trich (odd, I know).
Going back to what I said a few paragraphs up (the wanting to hurt myself), it doesn't make sense. I mean they're hurting me (emotionally), and all I want to do is hurt myself? It makes no sense. I WILL NOT hurt myself for thier actions. I REFUSE to. As Breaking Benjamin sang it "I will NOT bow, I will NOT break, I will shut the world away. I will NOT fall, I will NOT fade, I will take your breath away..."
Geez, just blogging about this is making me feel better. Not whole, my heart is still shattered. Just better.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
A Side Disorder
Hello Fuzz
Today, rather than updating on my life (which today was extremely hectic/stressful), I'd like to write about an experience many other trichsters share, especially when trying to quit: Face Picking.
I first noticed how much more I was picking at my acne around two weeks ago. It frustrates me incredibly that I have substituted my hair pulling with acne popping. Like trich, I believe, I do this to relieve stress and calm anxiety. But really all I'm doing is creating more stress and anxiety, while making myself increasingly hideous in the process. I know it will scar :( I just love it when I pinch the acne, and the "white stuff" flies out (due to increased pressure). Wow I sound insane o.o
If ANYONE does this, I plead that they PLEASE help me stop! I know that this blog is more of a diary, but in this case I need all the help I can get. I'm quite ashamed, but yea. Thanks for reading!
Today, rather than updating on my life (which today was extremely hectic/stressful), I'd like to write about an experience many other trichsters share, especially when trying to quit: Face Picking.
I first noticed how much more I was picking at my acne around two weeks ago. It frustrates me incredibly that I have substituted my hair pulling with acne popping. Like trich, I believe, I do this to relieve stress and calm anxiety. But really all I'm doing is creating more stress and anxiety, while making myself increasingly hideous in the process. I know it will scar :( I just love it when I pinch the acne, and the "white stuff" flies out (due to increased pressure). Wow I sound insane o.o
If ANYONE does this, I plead that they PLEASE help me stop! I know that this blog is more of a diary, but in this case I need all the help I can get. I'm quite ashamed, but yea. Thanks for reading!
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Wedding, Track Meet, Palm Sunday, OH MY!
Hola Fuzzy!
I just wanted to update on several points (It feels like I always start a post out like this...).
Firstly, yesterday was my first (highschool/sprinter) track meet! I ran the 100m, the 4x100m (relay) and jumped the long jump. Let's say it didn't turn out as well as I hoped. Soo in the 100m, usually the runners are split into "heats" of runners with the same speed. Not this time. I was put in the 2nd fastest heat, and I just started sprinting this year. I got dead last. Not by that much, but still. In the long jump, I scratched all 3 times (you get three tries, scratch = over the line). And finally, in the 4x100m, all was going well. I did well on my part (I'm a starter), however, my teamate accidentally dropped the baton in her handoff to my other teamate. But, I'm still bery proud of our team :)
Secondly, yesterday I went to a wedding! The last time I went to a wedding was when I was around 6. The ceremony was GORGEOUS! It was candlelight inside the War Memorial Chapel at Virginia Tech. Rachel, the bride, looked stunning! Then the reception was nearby, and three words: Open Candy Bar. I'm too young to drink (haha 15), so I drank coke. They played the electric slide, cupid shuffle, chacha slide, etc. The food was good, the cupcakes (they had a cupcake cake) were delicious, and the atmosphere was awesome. Whoever says that a wedding can't be set up in under 4 months was dead wrong (the bride had told her mom she was getting married around 4 months before the wedding).
Well, I have to go for now, but I'll write again later. My sister's friend is here, and I'm starving.
Well See ya!
I just wanted to update on several points (It feels like I always start a post out like this...).
Firstly, yesterday was my first (highschool/sprinter) track meet! I ran the 100m, the 4x100m (relay) and jumped the long jump. Let's say it didn't turn out as well as I hoped. Soo in the 100m, usually the runners are split into "heats" of runners with the same speed. Not this time. I was put in the 2nd fastest heat, and I just started sprinting this year. I got dead last. Not by that much, but still. In the long jump, I scratched all 3 times (you get three tries, scratch = over the line). And finally, in the 4x100m, all was going well. I did well on my part (I'm a starter), however, my teamate accidentally dropped the baton in her handoff to my other teamate. But, I'm still bery proud of our team :)
Secondly, yesterday I went to a wedding! The last time I went to a wedding was when I was around 6. The ceremony was GORGEOUS! It was candlelight inside the War Memorial Chapel at Virginia Tech. Rachel, the bride, looked stunning! Then the reception was nearby, and three words: Open Candy Bar. I'm too young to drink (haha 15), so I drank coke. They played the electric slide, cupid shuffle, chacha slide, etc. The food was good, the cupcakes (they had a cupcake cake) were delicious, and the atmosphere was awesome. Whoever says that a wedding can't be set up in under 4 months was dead wrong (the bride had told her mom she was getting married around 4 months before the wedding).
Well, I have to go for now, but I'll write again later. My sister's friend is here, and I'm starving.
Well See ya!
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Spring Challenge and More
Hey Fuzz!
Ahh it's a new day! Unfortunately here, it's gloomy, windy, gray, cloudy, treatening rain, and around 37 degrees. However, a new day, nonetheless! Well I guess it's time for some updates!
Firstly, as you may remember, my great uncle died on march 18. He had gone into hospice around a week earlier, and I was planning to go down to see him next week (we all thought he had at least a month left). On the morning of march 18, terminal lung cancer decided to take my final goodbye away. Sadly, I could not go to the funeral either. It was the day after his death in florida. Even though I really wanted to attend, there was no possible way to get myself there in time.
Secondly, track is going quite well. I'm enjoying sprints. Although I'm nowhere near the fastest, I still enjoy running with them. This week, there will be a meet (saturday). I'm in the 100meters and the 4x100 (relay) and the long jump. I have no idea why he put me in the long jump ( my furthest as of now is 8ft11in.... its really short). Anyways, so track is really fun :)
Thirdly, today will be extremely stressful. Today I have all my core classes (night schedule did this), and out of the 4 classes, I have 3 tests. In math, the test will determine the grade for the 6 weeks, as well as (possibly) the year. Ahh stressed.
Fourthly, I'm currently 80 days pullfree if you exclude today. :) I have also set up a new challenge (which I've posted on trichworld.com and dailystrength.org already), and here it is:
Spring Challenge:
Cubs: march 20 - 27
Lambs: march 28 - april 4
Chicks: april 5 - april 12
Pups: april 13 - april 20
Kittens: april 21 - april 28
Hatchlings: april 29 - may 6
Piglets: may 7 - may 14
Fawns: may 15 - may 22
Foals: may 23 - may 30
Ducklings: may 31 - june 7
Calfs: june 8 - june 15
Infants: june 16 - june 20.
Have fun and enjoy!
Well, that's all to update for today. Chow!
Ahh it's a new day! Unfortunately here, it's gloomy, windy, gray, cloudy, treatening rain, and around 37 degrees. However, a new day, nonetheless! Well I guess it's time for some updates!
Firstly, as you may remember, my great uncle died on march 18. He had gone into hospice around a week earlier, and I was planning to go down to see him next week (we all thought he had at least a month left). On the morning of march 18, terminal lung cancer decided to take my final goodbye away. Sadly, I could not go to the funeral either. It was the day after his death in florida. Even though I really wanted to attend, there was no possible way to get myself there in time.
Secondly, track is going quite well. I'm enjoying sprints. Although I'm nowhere near the fastest, I still enjoy running with them. This week, there will be a meet (saturday). I'm in the 100meters and the 4x100 (relay) and the long jump. I have no idea why he put me in the long jump ( my furthest as of now is 8ft11in.... its really short). Anyways, so track is really fun :)
Thirdly, today will be extremely stressful. Today I have all my core classes (night schedule did this), and out of the 4 classes, I have 3 tests. In math, the test will determine the grade for the 6 weeks, as well as (possibly) the year. Ahh stressed.
Fourthly, I'm currently 80 days pullfree if you exclude today. :) I have also set up a new challenge (which I've posted on trichworld.com and dailystrength.org already), and here it is:
Spring Challenge:
Cubs: march 20 - 27
Lambs: march 28 - april 4
Chicks: april 5 - april 12
Pups: april 13 - april 20
Kittens: april 21 - april 28
Hatchlings: april 29 - may 6
Piglets: may 7 - may 14
Fawns: may 15 - may 22
Foals: may 23 - may 30
Ducklings: may 31 - june 7
Calfs: june 8 - june 15
Infants: june 16 - june 20.
Have fun and enjoy!
Well, that's all to update for today. Chow!
Thursday, March 18, 2010
R.I.P "Uncle" Jack
Dear Fuzzy.
I just wanted to tell you that this morning, Uncle Jack passed away :( I'm still pf (76th day today).
Well.
Got to go. Talk to you later.
Yea.
I just wanted to tell you that this morning, Uncle Jack passed away :( I'm still pf (76th day today).
Well.
Got to go. Talk to you later.
Yea.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Update
Hey Fuzzy!
Sorry for such a late update.
Firstly, it is gloomy here again. For the past several days, there has been no sun, but rather a bunch of gray clouds. Sort of dull if you ask me.
Secondly, track has been fun. I'm super unhappy with my running, though. I'm not a good sprinter at all. Nor am I good at jumping. It's not fair. I'm always in last :(
Thirdly, today in gym there was an awkward situation. One of my friends was talking to my other friends, saying things like "haha and then you'll pull your hair out!". Neither of them know I have trich, so AWKWARD!
Fourthly, the new school schedule is messing me up! I get to bed late, have to wake up early (homework) and then track, shower, if time - homework, school repeat. It sucks. I'm so tired once I get home, as well as once I wake up. I just want to sleep, ya know?
Fifthly, today I got stuck in french for an hour and 35 minutes. On the new schedule, it is only supposed to be 1:15. Today, however, SOLs were being taken, so our class was extended 20 mintues. My friends and I all thought we were going to die (my french teacher is evil).
Sixthly, I made a new event! I have it posted on these things: trichworld (under events), dailystrength (under trichotillomania - discussions), and yahoo (under the trichees and teentrich groups under discussions).
Seventhly, I am currently 74 days pf! :)
Well, I'm dead tired, so goodnight! :)
Sorry for such a late update.
Firstly, it is gloomy here again. For the past several days, there has been no sun, but rather a bunch of gray clouds. Sort of dull if you ask me.
Secondly, track has been fun. I'm super unhappy with my running, though. I'm not a good sprinter at all. Nor am I good at jumping. It's not fair. I'm always in last :(
Thirdly, today in gym there was an awkward situation. One of my friends was talking to my other friends, saying things like "haha and then you'll pull your hair out!". Neither of them know I have trich, so AWKWARD!
Fourthly, the new school schedule is messing me up! I get to bed late, have to wake up early (homework) and then track, shower, if time - homework, school repeat. It sucks. I'm so tired once I get home, as well as once I wake up. I just want to sleep, ya know?
Fifthly, today I got stuck in french for an hour and 35 minutes. On the new schedule, it is only supposed to be 1:15. Today, however, SOLs were being taken, so our class was extended 20 mintues. My friends and I all thought we were going to die (my french teacher is evil).
Sixthly, I made a new event! I have it posted on these things: trichworld (under events), dailystrength (under trichotillomania - discussions), and yahoo (under the trichees and teentrich groups under discussions).
Seventhly, I am currently 74 days pf! :)
Well, I'm dead tired, so goodnight! :)
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Hey Fuzz..
Though the weather is beautiful, today is terrible. Today, I found out that my "uncle" (tech. great uncle, but since I don't have a real uncle, he acted as one) Jack is now in hospice. In september I found out that he had terminal lung cancer, but now that he's in hospice... And to make things worse, I also found out that I have a cavity. This is my 2nd one ever, the 1st one being in 1st grade. I've been brushing 3 times a day, and rising my mouth with ACT twice a day. Also, I have to finish a class essay for a test in 20 mins (I'm not that far) and take a math test. And I can't concentrate.
I can't talk anymore. Everytime I talk about this I burst out crying.
So Maybe I'll Update Tonight.
Off To School Soon (Parents won't let me take a sick day)
~Lauren.
:(
Though the weather is beautiful, today is terrible. Today, I found out that my "uncle" (tech. great uncle, but since I don't have a real uncle, he acted as one) Jack is now in hospice. In september I found out that he had terminal lung cancer, but now that he's in hospice... And to make things worse, I also found out that I have a cavity. This is my 2nd one ever, the 1st one being in 1st grade. I've been brushing 3 times a day, and rising my mouth with ACT twice a day. Also, I have to finish a class essay for a test in 20 mins (I'm not that far) and take a math test. And I can't concentrate.
I can't talk anymore. Everytime I talk about this I burst out crying.
So Maybe I'll Update Tonight.
Off To School Soon (Parents won't let me take a sick day)
~Lauren.
:(
Sunday, March 7, 2010
So Mad... Need to Vent!!!
Hey Fuzzy.
Today I want to talk about a sensitive subject. Okay, so on facebook, this girl, Alicia, decided to have the status "Say Yes!!! Abortion". I'm prolife, so naturally I stated kindly the reasons why I believe abortion is wrong. It ended up with her joking about self harm (which I've dealt with [I'll tell you another day about it]) and insulting Christians and the bible. I'm really offended to the point of tears. And she talks about how her life is so much worse than mine. She doesn't know me, nor does she even know what I've been through. I've been verbally abused (breakup gone bad), my aunt is in remission from lung cancer, I have trich, I've dealt with self harm, my uncle has terminal lung cancer, etc. Who is she to insult me? Ugh, I'm just so MAD!
I really need to vent.
Still pf. 65th day.
Today I want to talk about a sensitive subject. Okay, so on facebook, this girl, Alicia, decided to have the status "Say Yes!!! Abortion". I'm prolife, so naturally I stated kindly the reasons why I believe abortion is wrong. It ended up with her joking about self harm (which I've dealt with [I'll tell you another day about it]) and insulting Christians and the bible. I'm really offended to the point of tears. And she talks about how her life is so much worse than mine. She doesn't know me, nor does she even know what I've been through. I've been verbally abused (breakup gone bad), my aunt is in remission from lung cancer, I have trich, I've dealt with self harm, my uncle has terminal lung cancer, etc. Who is she to insult me? Ugh, I'm just so MAD!
I really need to vent.
Still pf. 65th day.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Cassie
Hey Fuzz!
Wow, I haven't updated in a while. My bad :P
Anyways, on Monday track started. I decided to do sprints this year, and let me tell you... Best. Decision. Ever. It is so much fun! I mean, when we do longer distances, it's torture (haha just like long distance running). But when we do short sprints, the feeling is Amazing! I'm completely sore now :P Worth it? Heck Yes. Unfortunately, since it's from 9-11 am (nightschool, remember?) I barely have time to do my homework. After I get home, it's showers, eat, then school. But yea. Worth it :)
Okay, so my history teacher is officially evil. I used to look forward to that class everday, as well as my friends. However, since nightschool he has started a new notetaking system. Since we have to write stupid stuff already in our notes (he checks it), I miss out on all the details... then we get "pop quizzes" with 4-5 questions. We've had two so far - I've failed both. The first one was because I couldn't spell nor remember anything (Stupid Notes!). The second one, which I read the chapters it was on 5-7 times, I still failed. Why? Because I misspelled everything. It's in my jeans! No one in my family can spell... I still spell consoler 5 ways (consoler, consoleur, conselur, conseluer, consulor, etc.). These are the only two things that I have EVER failed in history. E.V.E.R.
I would like to update you on my trich! Okay, so I'm currently (including today) 60 days pf! I'm super syched! I haven't really gotten any urges for a while now. And if I do, I know how to handle it :) Of course I know that I can relapse anytime, but for now I'm satisfied with my progress. This is also the most I've ever been pf (since I started). I tried once in october... which lasted less than 2 weeks. So I'm happy about that. :)
Oh yea. Sometime soon I would love to write a letter to myself. Maybe during lunch. Not sure. But yea. :)
Well, I have to get started on the evil wretched homework (mostly history..... :/) So goodnight! :)
P.S. Recently I bought 3 new albums: "We are not Alone" & "Dear Agony" (Breaking Benjamin) and "Flyleaf" (Flyleaf). Two songs in particular on these albums speak to me (both by flyleaf): 1. Cassie 2. Red Sam. Maybe it's just the music, maybe it's not. Either ways, they do.
Well, Goodnight!
Wow, I haven't updated in a while. My bad :P
Anyways, on Monday track started. I decided to do sprints this year, and let me tell you... Best. Decision. Ever. It is so much fun! I mean, when we do longer distances, it's torture (haha just like long distance running). But when we do short sprints, the feeling is Amazing! I'm completely sore now :P Worth it? Heck Yes. Unfortunately, since it's from 9-11 am (nightschool, remember?) I barely have time to do my homework. After I get home, it's showers, eat, then school. But yea. Worth it :)
Okay, so my history teacher is officially evil. I used to look forward to that class everday, as well as my friends. However, since nightschool he has started a new notetaking system. Since we have to write stupid stuff already in our notes (he checks it), I miss out on all the details... then we get "pop quizzes" with 4-5 questions. We've had two so far - I've failed both. The first one was because I couldn't spell nor remember anything (Stupid Notes!). The second one, which I read the chapters it was on 5-7 times, I still failed. Why? Because I misspelled everything. It's in my jeans! No one in my family can spell... I still spell consoler 5 ways (consoler, consoleur, conselur, conseluer, consulor, etc.). These are the only two things that I have EVER failed in history. E.V.E.R.
I would like to update you on my trich! Okay, so I'm currently (including today) 60 days pf! I'm super syched! I haven't really gotten any urges for a while now. And if I do, I know how to handle it :) Of course I know that I can relapse anytime, but for now I'm satisfied with my progress. This is also the most I've ever been pf (since I started). I tried once in october... which lasted less than 2 weeks. So I'm happy about that. :)
Oh yea. Sometime soon I would love to write a letter to myself. Maybe during lunch. Not sure. But yea. :)
Well, I have to get started on the evil wretched homework (mostly history..... :/) So goodnight! :)
P.S. Recently I bought 3 new albums: "We are not Alone" & "Dear Agony" (Breaking Benjamin) and "Flyleaf" (Flyleaf). Two songs in particular on these albums speak to me (both by flyleaf): 1. Cassie 2. Red Sam. Maybe it's just the music, maybe it's not. Either ways, they do.
Well, Goodnight!
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Nightschool Update!
Hello Fuzz!
Okay, so as I promised, I'm back to talk about nightschool so far.
Cons:
- Basically no nighttime TV
- Sports are all messed up and are early in the morning
- Wake up -> do homeowork -> school -> eat -> sleep -> repeat
- Night is my favorite time of day. I don't want to be in school during my fav time of day.
- Forget afterschool stuff
- Lunch is at 2..... I get home at 8 and eat lunch at noon...
- I miss seeing my freinds' faces everyday and while passing by them in the hall :(
Pros:
- I actually get math because I'm more awake
- I get 2 days to do my homework (core classes are on "B" days)
- The bus ride is much more calm
- There are windows
- I can stay up late... for now (until sports season starts next week)
As you can see, this is definately a change.... Boy do I miss seeing some people's faces :(
Well, this is my 54th day pf. I'll update/talk to you tomorrow.
Night!
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Interview @ Nightschool... :)
Hey Fuzzy!
So today we started night school. I actually somewhat enjoyed it. I stay in my favorite hallway basically everyday. The only classes I don't have in the 7th grade hallway are gym, lunch, and french. Oh yea, we also run on a block schedule now :) I have all my core classes one day, which is nice because I get two days to do my homework. Anyways, today I also was interviewed by a reporter from roanoke times!! I thought it was fun. Anyways, I'll tell you more about night school tomorrow, since today was a "B" day, and tomorrow is "A". This way, I'll have a much more complete update.
Anyways, better get to my homework!!!
Night!!! ;D
So today we started night school. I actually somewhat enjoyed it. I stay in my favorite hallway basically everyday. The only classes I don't have in the 7th grade hallway are gym, lunch, and french. Oh yea, we also run on a block schedule now :) I have all my core classes one day, which is nice because I get two days to do my homework. Anyways, today I also was interviewed by a reporter from roanoke times!! I thought it was fun. Anyways, I'll tell you more about night school tomorrow, since today was a "B" day, and tomorrow is "A". This way, I'll have a much more complete update.
Anyways, better get to my homework!!!
Night!!! ;D
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Time For Celebration!!! :D
Heya Fuzzy!
Okay, so good news. Today is my 50th day pullfree!!! And to make things better, I've stayed pullfree during a lot of stress. Here are just a few of the things I've survived:
1. midterms.
2. my gym collapsing
3. learning that we are going to attend night classes at the middleschool since our gym made our building "unsafe"
4. being stuck at home for over 3 weeks due to bad weather/school, which not only stresses me out, but also bores me (so my urges rose)
5. knowing that I may become unable to do my favorite "afterschool" stuff, since we will be getting out late
Etc.
So today I went running. I'm super out of shape. I need to lose weight. I ran around 35 minutes or so (including hills [running up a hill at easy, medium, and hard paces])
Anyways, I'm going to celebrate this amazing feat with myself by making myself desert. This may not be really a celebration (esp. since I'm not on a diet or anything), but hey. :)
Well goodnight Fuzzy!!
Okay, so good news. Today is my 50th day pullfree!!! And to make things better, I've stayed pullfree during a lot of stress. Here are just a few of the things I've survived:
1. midterms.
2. my gym collapsing
3. learning that we are going to attend night classes at the middleschool since our gym made our building "unsafe"
4. being stuck at home for over 3 weeks due to bad weather/school, which not only stresses me out, but also bores me (so my urges rose)
5. knowing that I may become unable to do my favorite "afterschool" stuff, since we will be getting out late
Etc.
So today I went running. I'm super out of shape. I need to lose weight. I ran around 35 minutes or so (including hills [running up a hill at easy, medium, and hard paces])
Anyways, I'm going to celebrate this amazing feat with myself by making myself desert. This may not be really a celebration (esp. since I'm not on a diet or anything), but hey. :)
Well goodnight Fuzzy!!
Technically-Yesterday...
Hello Fuzzy!
So it's 12:05 a.m., I'm going to tell you about technically-yesterday.
Okay, so I organized a history "class" for friday a few days prior. So first, I went to the 11-11:45 a.m. class. We all talked about the plans for school [you should know by now that our school basically died]. We (as in us kids) found out that we will be attending night classes on a block schedule... :(
After the "class", I met up with some of the members of a Girl's Bible Study at Panera Bread. It was really fun, even if the cashier person got my drink wrong. So rather than with chocolate milk, I had a french toast bagel toasted with cream cheese and regular milk.
Directly after the lunch, I went back to attend the second "class", which happend to be at the college's library... Let's just say my friends, sister, and I got lost.. for around 40 minutes... and traveled in various circles... However, it was still a fun adventure :)
That basically sums up the interesting part of my day!
Well, technically-good-morning Fuzzy!
Talk to you technically-tonight (hopefully with more interesting stuff to talk about)!
P.S. without counting technically-today, I am 49 days pull free!!!! :)
P.P.S. American Guys beat France in Curling :P
So it's 12:05 a.m., I'm going to tell you about technically-yesterday.
Okay, so I organized a history "class" for friday a few days prior. So first, I went to the 11-11:45 a.m. class. We all talked about the plans for school [you should know by now that our school basically died]. We (as in us kids) found out that we will be attending night classes on a block schedule... :(
After the "class", I met up with some of the members of a Girl's Bible Study at Panera Bread. It was really fun, even if the cashier person got my drink wrong. So rather than with chocolate milk, I had a french toast bagel toasted with cream cheese and regular milk.
Directly after the lunch, I went back to attend the second "class", which happend to be at the college's library... Let's just say my friends, sister, and I got lost.. for around 40 minutes... and traveled in various circles... However, it was still a fun adventure :)
That basically sums up the interesting part of my day!
Well, technically-good-morning Fuzzy!
Talk to you technically-tonight (hopefully with more interesting stuff to talk about)!
P.S. without counting technically-today, I am 49 days pull free!!!! :)
P.P.S. American Guys beat France in Curling :P
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Lent Challange
Hey Fuzzy!
Okay, since the feedback I recieved for the Valentine's Day Pull-Free-Athon (which I think I told you about), I decided to create a Lent Challenge. Here's the information: (P.S. yes I copied pasted from the sites I posted this on).
Hey everyone! Okay so as most of you know, people usually give up something for Lent. Well, this year, I will be giving up Trich for Lent. I encourage you all to join me in this journey :)
Location: Everywhere
Dates: Feb 17 - April 4
Due to the length of this challenge, I will break it up in weeks:
Mission 1: Feb 17 - Feb 24
Mission 2: Feb 25 - Mar 4
Mission 3: Mar 5 - Mar 12
Mission 4: Mar 13 - Mar 20
Mission 5: Mar 21 - Mar 28
Mission 6: Mar 29 - Apr 4
:) I wish you all luck and even if you don't make it through every mission, know that how long you were pullfree is a major accomplishment :)
Let me know what you guys think of these events I've been creating :)
So Fuzzy, I hope I can personally complete each mission :) But more importantly, I hope others find this event helpful :)
P.P.S. This picture was taken in fall, not spring :P
Okay, since the feedback I recieved for the Valentine's Day Pull-Free-Athon (which I think I told you about), I decided to create a Lent Challenge. Here's the information: (P.S. yes I copied pasted from the sites I posted this on).
Hey everyone! Okay so as most of you know, people usually give up something for Lent. Well, this year, I will be giving up Trich for Lent. I encourage you all to join me in this journey :)
Location: Everywhere
Dates: Feb 17 - April 4
Due to the length of this challenge, I will break it up in weeks:
Mission 1: Feb 17 - Feb 24
Mission 2: Feb 25 - Mar 4
Mission 3: Mar 5 - Mar 12
Mission 4: Mar 13 - Mar 20
Mission 5: Mar 21 - Mar 28
Mission 6: Mar 29 - Apr 4
:) I wish you all luck and even if you don't make it through every mission, know that how long you were pullfree is a major accomplishment :)
Let me know what you guys think of these events I've been creating :)
So Fuzzy, I hope I can personally complete each mission :) But more importantly, I hope others find this event helpful :)
P.P.S. This picture was taken in fall, not spring :P
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Winter Games
Hey Fuzz!
Well, firstly I do not know anymore information regarding the gym at the moment. Anyways, last night I went to a girls bible study sleepover and I watched the winter olympics while everyone else slept. American Apolo Ohno won a silver medal in Short Track (speed skating) whereas American J.R. Celski won bronze :D Also, Hannah Kearney (also American) won gold in women's moguls (basically skiing down an extremely bumpy slope). :D :D Unfortunately, as you may know, Nodar Kumaritashvili, a Georgian luger, died at the age of 21 in a training run on February 12, 2010. This was his first olympics. R.I.P. Nodar. Prayers to his family.
By the way, 44 days pf if you include today.
P.S. the picture of Nomar I included is one of when he was still alive and well. I did this in respect to him and his family & friends. I did not include any pictures or videos of his crash or death.
Apolo Ohno
J.R. Celski (sorry, couldn't find a picture from this year's race.)
Hannah Kearney
Nodar Kumarithashvili
Well, firstly I do not know anymore information regarding the gym at the moment. Anyways, last night I went to a girls bible study sleepover and I watched the winter olympics while everyone else slept. American Apolo Ohno won a silver medal in Short Track (speed skating) whereas American J.R. Celski won bronze :D Also, Hannah Kearney (also American) won gold in women's moguls (basically skiing down an extremely bumpy slope). :D :D Unfortunately, as you may know, Nodar Kumaritashvili, a Georgian luger, died at the age of 21 in a training run on February 12, 2010. This was his first olympics. R.I.P. Nodar. Prayers to his family.
By the way, 44 days pf if you include today.
P.S. the picture of Nomar I included is one of when he was still alive and well. I did this in respect to him and his family & friends. I did not include any pictures or videos of his crash or death.
Apolo Ohno
J.R. Celski (sorry, couldn't find a picture from this year's race.)
Hannah Kearney
Nodar Kumarithashvili
Saturday, February 13, 2010
The Day The Gym Collapsed...
Hey Fuzzy.
Good news and bad news. I'll start with the good news first.
The Good News:
1. Last night I went to an all night rock-climbing thing. It was awesome. A lot of my friends were there. I got not sleep :)
2. My girls bible study is having a sleep over tonight :)
Bad News:
1. Today, our highschool gym collapsed. Our varsity basketball team was playing when the first wall began to show signs of collapse. An hour later, the whole gym just collapsed. I'll try to post pictures tommorrow.
Well, got to go.
Bye.
Good news and bad news. I'll start with the good news first.
The Good News:
1. Last night I went to an all night rock-climbing thing. It was awesome. A lot of my friends were there. I got not sleep :)
2. My girls bible study is having a sleep over tonight :)
Bad News:
1. Today, our highschool gym collapsed. Our varsity basketball team was playing when the first wall began to show signs of collapse. An hour later, the whole gym just collapsed. I'll try to post pictures tommorrow.
Well, got to go.
Bye.
Friday, February 12, 2010
Yesterday... :S
Hey Fuzzy,
I just wanted to say that I almost pulled yesterday. I didn't have my playdoh within hands reach, had my hat off, and was watching tv alone at 12:30 in the morning. I began feeling the regrowth then my hand started to feel individual hairs. Luckily I noticed this before it was too late and went upstairs. Luckily, I'm 41 days pull free (not including today). I really need to be careful. I'm so mad at myself for almost letting me do that! I could have relapsed! Ugh.
Well, talk to you later tonight.
I just wanted to say that I almost pulled yesterday. I didn't have my playdoh within hands reach, had my hat off, and was watching tv alone at 12:30 in the morning. I began feeling the regrowth then my hand started to feel individual hairs. Luckily I noticed this before it was too late and went upstairs. Luckily, I'm 41 days pull free (not including today). I really need to be careful. I'm so mad at myself for almost letting me do that! I could have relapsed! Ugh.
Well, talk to you later tonight.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Funny Video Link
Hi Fuzzy!
Sorry for the second write of the day. Firstly, I'm now 39 days pull free & counting. Also, I set up a Pull-Free-Athon for Valentine's day on trichworld. I made the event so that people would keep in mind to also love themself.
But, the reason I'm writing is to share this video:
(Look Under Comments)
Goodnight Fuzter!
Sorry for the second write of the day. Firstly, I'm now 39 days pull free & counting. Also, I set up a Pull-Free-Athon for Valentine's day on trichworld. I made the event so that people would keep in mind to also love themself.
But, the reason I'm writing is to share this video:
(Look Under Comments)
Goodnight Fuzter!
I'm REALLY Out of Shape
Hey Fuzzy!
Okay, so I forgot to write again yesterday. Anyways, I was super excited after finding out that one of my friends also has trich, (Not because of trich, but because now I actually know someone who's been my real-life freind since camp of last year that can help encourage me/vise versa).
Anyways, today I decided to go on a brisk jog. Let me just say, I'm out of shape. Firstly, it was icy. Secondly, out of 31 minutes, I only ran maybe 26. That means I walked 5. I know I shouldn't be so hard on myself, since the last time I actually ran (like track ran) was last year. Either ways, no matter how bad I am at running, I still seem to be happy afterwards. I think I'm going to join track as a sprinter this year, since last year and the year before I did long distance.
Last year, the season was pretty much worthless. Why? I was sick for 1/2 of it. My friend had decided to come to an event with who-knows-what, making me sick for about 4 weeks. Fun, Fun, Fun!
Well the reasons I want to try sprinting this year are:
1. I want to try something different
2. I'm pretty good at sprints
3. Long distance in highschool goes up to 2 miles in meets - I run up to 1/2 miles in meets
4. Freshman year is the best year to try it
5. I think I may enjoy it more
Who knows? I may end up hating sprinting. If I do, then I'll just train for long distance for sophomore year!
Well, I'm going to go on trichworld, so I'll talk to you later!
P.S. not including today (since the day isn't over), I'm 38 days pullfree :)
Okay, so I forgot to write again yesterday. Anyways, I was super excited after finding out that one of my friends also has trich, (Not because of trich, but because now I actually know someone who's been my real-life freind since camp of last year that can help encourage me/vise versa).
Anyways, today I decided to go on a brisk jog. Let me just say, I'm out of shape. Firstly, it was icy. Secondly, out of 31 minutes, I only ran maybe 26. That means I walked 5. I know I shouldn't be so hard on myself, since the last time I actually ran (like track ran) was last year. Either ways, no matter how bad I am at running, I still seem to be happy afterwards. I think I'm going to join track as a sprinter this year, since last year and the year before I did long distance.
Last year, the season was pretty much worthless. Why? I was sick for 1/2 of it. My friend had decided to come to an event with who-knows-what, making me sick for about 4 weeks. Fun, Fun, Fun!
Well the reasons I want to try sprinting this year are:
1. I want to try something different
2. I'm pretty good at sprints
3. Long distance in highschool goes up to 2 miles in meets - I run up to 1/2 miles in meets
4. Freshman year is the best year to try it
5. I think I may enjoy it more
Who knows? I may end up hating sprinting. If I do, then I'll just train for long distance for sophomore year!
Well, I'm going to go on trichworld, so I'll talk to you later!
P.S. not including today (since the day isn't over), I'm 38 days pullfree :)
Monday, February 8, 2010
Happiest Day Of My Life
Dear Fuzzy.
Words cannot explain the joy I'm feeling right now. Okay, so you know how I have trich, right? Well, so does my friend. I'm SO HAPPY!!! I knew I wasn't alone, but never like this. The amazing thing is that neither of us thought the other had trich!
Sorry, my emotions are running deep. I'll be more thourough later.
SO HAPPY!!!
Bye!
Words cannot explain the joy I'm feeling right now. Okay, so you know how I have trich, right? Well, so does my friend. I'm SO HAPPY!!! I knew I wasn't alone, but never like this. The amazing thing is that neither of us thought the other had trich!
Sorry, my emotions are running deep. I'll be more thourough later.
SO HAPPY!!!
Bye!
Sunday, February 7, 2010
SuperBowl
Hey Fuzzy!!!
P.S. Peyton Manning = Fav. QB :P
Okay, so today was the day I've been looking forward to for a while... Why? Today was the SuperBowl. However, today has not been struggle-free. Firstly, I almost didn't go. Why? Dad. He doesn't know when enough is enough. Well anyways, my team, the colts, lost. :( On the bright side, I'm proud of the saints for winning their first SuperBowl. Ending score? 31-17. O well, always next year!
Anyways, I made colts cupcakes (funfetti with blue icing and piped on white horseshoes).
Also, today I felt comfort in answering questions on Yahoo Answers (Y!A). These questions others asked regarded trich. I gave them my email and shared tips. :)
Well, Goonight!!
P.S. Peyton Manning = Fav. QB :P
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Bones :D
Hey Fuzzy!
Okay, so over the past few days, we've had no school due to "winter weather" (icy roads, etc.) Tomorrow, we go back... At least we have a 2-hour delay..
ANyways, I've been busy. I'm not yet done with Gates of Fire, and let me tell you: It's not a book to read if you're rushing to do a paper on it. Also, I finished my nutrition paper.
Anyways, I'd rather talk about something peaceful... Something like the t.v. show Bones. It's my favorite show. I feel incredibly smart when watching it, as I know a lot about medical stuff (say any bone, for example, and I will tell you exactly where it is). I love watching re-runs, since I hate being left hanging. The show NEVER gets old. I love it :D
Well, I have to get back to reading The Odyssey (english.)
Well, Goodnight Fuzzy! Sending love :)
Okay, so over the past few days, we've had no school due to "winter weather" (icy roads, etc.) Tomorrow, we go back... At least we have a 2-hour delay..
ANyways, I've been busy. I'm not yet done with Gates of Fire, and let me tell you: It's not a book to read if you're rushing to do a paper on it. Also, I finished my nutrition paper.
Anyways, I'd rather talk about something peaceful... Something like the t.v. show Bones. It's my favorite show. I feel incredibly smart when watching it, as I know a lot about medical stuff (say any bone, for example, and I will tell you exactly where it is). I love watching re-runs, since I hate being left hanging. The show NEVER gets old. I love it :D
Well, I have to get back to reading The Odyssey (english.)
Well, Goodnight Fuzzy! Sending love :)
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